(postmodernbarney.com) » Uncomfortable Plot Summaries


A refreshing dose of cynicism to clear away the bitter aftertaste of withered optimism. These “uncomfortable plot summaries” cheered me up. Thanks, man!

# CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY: Deranged pedophile big-business industrialist tortures and mutilates young children.

# KARATE KID: Boy gains acceptance through violence.

# SCHINDLER’S LIST: Wealthy industrialist expands not-for-profit ventures.

# SUPERMAN RETURNS: Illegal immigrant is deadbeat dad.

#THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST: Mel Gibson fulfills fantasy of showing a Jew beaten to a bloody pulp and killed on-screen.

#TITANIC: Crazy old widow disregards lifelong memories of husband, children, and grandchildren in favor of that one time she fucked a bum.

# W.: Unspeakable disaster afflicts America. Then terrorists attack.

# WORLD TRADE CENTER: Rag-tag group of underdogs succeed at a massive undertaking despite overwhelming odds, credit success with faith in God.

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