Survival of the Trendiest

Slate writer attempts über-trendiness by following the often-ridiculous advice of the NY Times’ Style section. Hilarity (or bemusement, anyway) ensues.

Mocking strangers to their baby faces was harder than I thought. But if trendiness was easy, then we’d all be silk-screening our own postcards. I decided to give it another go, walking over to a fuzzless man selling eyeglasses. After some small talk, I pounced.

Me: Do the other vendors ever make fun of you for not having a beard?

Vendor: What? What are you talking about?

Me (panicking): You know, ’cause they all seem to have beards and mustaches.

Vendor: Oh, I thought you said beer.

Me: No, I said beard.

Vendor: Yeah, sometimes they do.

Me: Should I make fun of you for not having a beard?

Vendor: Go right ahead!

Me: Your hairless face is disgusting to me.

via New York Times trend stories: What happened when I slept with 30 pillows, wore my hair in a “man bun,” and waxed my pubic hair. – Slate Magazine.

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