Posh and Becks are coming to LA to be with the rest of the Plastic People. Yawn.

I’ve always found David Beckham to be a waste of space. Some of the girls in the office today took umbrage at this, apparently seeing him as a big, walking aphrodisiac. Clearly, they’ve never listened to him speak.

Witness the so-many-things-wrong scenario he presents here:

“I was on the phone to him (Cruise) for about an hour last night and an hour the night before,” Beckham told reporters on Friday.

“Obviously I asked him for his advice because he is a very wise man and a very good friend of mine.

To a knuckle-dragger like Beckham, Tom Cruise is a super-genius. Converting him to Scientology shouldn’t be too tough, if it hasn’t already occurred.

The former Manchester United player said soccer had huge potential in the United States, particularly with children, despite its second-class status by comparison with basketball, baseball, football and ice hockey.

There’s the death knell for this non-story: Ranking soccer below hockey, which is graciously bumped into the first-class category despite mediocre US audiences and no TV interest. (Also note that they had to specify “ice” – in case it’s mistaken for “roller” or “field”.) If Pele couldn’t make a lasting impact on North American soccer, I doubt highly that David Beckham will be much more efficient.

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